Sheldon A.K.A. Speedy Gonzales

It’s apparent that Sheldon is her father’s daughter. They both are addicted to the intoxicating high they get with the wind whipping through their hair when pressing the gas pedal to the limit. Sadly, her recent meet up with flashing blue lights were impervious to her blond cuteness and it added another 2 points to her growing count.

The first time she was pulled over was 1 month into her shiny new driving freedom pass. “Mom…..sniff, I just got a pulled over and got a ticket” she said in the high tight voice that only high strung Italian greyhound dogs can hear. “Dad is going to KILL me.” Oh honey child, when I first met your dear old daddy, his license was suspended for too many tickets. And so the circle of speed begins.

Last year was an avalanche of those pesky tickets. First, photo radar clocked her doing 47 mph in a 35mph zone. Off to traffic school you sweet you thing, no worries you can go once every two years and no troublesome points to rat to you out to the insurance company. A few weeks later I happened to be a hostage/passenger in her little Ford Focus. “My love, you seem to be driving a teeny tiny bit fast for Mommy’s liking, umm 78 in a 65 might get you pulled over.” Snarling as only an overly sensitive young adult can…..” its fine, I drive like this all the time.” Okie dokie Smokie, I just tightened my belt and checked that the airbag was poised to be activated. Not one week later a little someone got pulled over doing EIGHTY EIGHT in a SIXTY FIVE. Yes indeed, criminal speeding for our little drag racer. Fortunately, the judge took pity on her and reduced it to civil speeding and oops three points rather than shiny handcuffs.

Every conversation at her last trip inside the familiar courtroom started the same way. They all quizzically asked why she didn’t take the remedial driver’s class. In her mind she was traveling with the flow of traffic, not that she wasn’t eligible for an afternoon jail sentence. In the end, she lost, another two points to her pinball tally. This week’s gig will hopefully make her feel a little better.

Low Fat Bisquick Oven Fried Chicken
2 pounds meaty chicken pieces with skin
2/3 cup Bisquick reduced fat baking mix
1 ½ teaspoon paprika
1 teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 tablespoon butter

Place butter in 13x9 pan. Preheat oven to 425 degrees and place pan and butter in oven while it’s preheating. Combine bisquick, paprika, salt and pepper in a large resealable bag. Rinse chicken with water and place in bag one or two pieces at a time and shake to coat well. Place meat in pan, meat side down. Bake 35 minutes, turn pieces over and bake an additional 15 minutes or until internal temperature reaches 160 degrees.

I didn’t have the heart to tell her I was once pulled over by a cop skulking behind a tree when I was about her age. I told him he’d scared me hiding and I stepped on the gas instead of the brake. He laughed so hard he popped the button on his pants and told me to move along as he scurried back to his cruiser. Whew, dodged a bullet that time.

So on a side note, Mrs. Tuna has been have a pretty crappy month at work, so crappy she doesn’t even feel like blogging. So think good karma thoughts for improvement at the slave market, or she will have to rest her head on her keyboard since nothing funny will come out. However, getting more followers might perk me up.