Saturday, February 25, 2012

Man Down!!!

Hello? Is there anybody out there? Someone stopping by this sadly neglected little blog? The place I had been faithfully posting every week until now? Well Team Tuna, I’m currently sucking  at writing. But all for good reason. Itty Bitty has been showing signs of life. I’m racing around selling my mad skills like a bona fide wack a doodle.  Additionally, the company that endlessly interviews me is having me do contract stuff. Was it my charm? No, it’s because they are under the gun to impress a new patron who I’ve done a few previous projects for.  Desperate times call for desperate measures. 

Higher education and self-employment are definitely cutting into having any darn fun.  But being the resourceful chick I am, I discovered across the street from campus lurks the perfect place  to meet Miss Anonymous for beer and fried food between my Urban Popsicles Procedures and Planning Ethics for Dummies class.   Who can even tell if I’m tipsy in class, by the time the freaking three hour class is over I no longer need that darn designated driver.  Maybe I haven’t written because the last few weeks I’ve been working like 50 hours a week and still taking SEVENTEEN freaking credit so I haven’t cooked either. My fantasy if I had any time would be to make a fancy assed dinner.

Lime-Garlic Pork Roast

This is a multi stop project that actually goes really quick on the grill. The first step is to brine the pork loins to make them really juicy and tender.

Brine Mixture
½ cup kosher salt
½ cup sugar

Dissolve salt and sugar in a large bowl with about 6 cups of water. Submerge pork loins in brine and let stand for 45 minutes. Rise pork well and pat dry.

3 tablespoons olive oil
Juice from two limes
2 cloves garlic minced
1 teaspoon dried thyme.

Run brined tenderloins all over with the olive oil, dab with garlic, squeeze lime juice over top and sprinkle with thyme.Heat gas grill to high for 10 to 15 minutes, reduce heat to medium. Place pork on grill rotating every  7 minutes for approximately 20-25 minutes or until the instant read thermometer reads 145 degrees.

Since I have fifteen cents to rub together and the Big Tuna’s gave me generous Christmas gift of riding lessons I’ve been treating myself to a little bit of equine time.  Usually I ride like a little spider monkey, riding those bucking broncos with no worries. Sue the Sadist decided I could ride Widow Maker. But  I got my assed bucked off last weekend. As I lay flat on my back gasping for air I thought f*ck, I’m too old for this sh*t.  As the spectators sauntered over to help me up, one queried if she should remove my helmet. Ah, no. Who wants to face the new nurse at the Christopher Reeves center with hat head?  

I had a huge slice of skin off my nose, hanging by a thread. Ewwwww, I had to drive home holding a tissue to the wound until I could get to a more sanitary place to snip off.  Heavens, I wouldn’t want to cut if off with the same barn scissors that I cut dirty horse bandages and mats with.  Crud, I could only find Kung Fu Panda Band-Aids.  Why haven’t they invented a roll cage for this sport? All I can say is Buck Off!!! 

Have a great week peeps and don’t forget to “Like” Mrs. Tuna to help heal my pain. 

Monday, February 13, 2012

Epic Fail!!!

Mrs. Tuna is too busy with Itty Bitty Consulting and watching students sleep in the library. (This is an actual student who passed out next to me 10 minutes ago) Please don't hate me. I promises a new and exciting post this weekend!!!!!!! No recipe, just take yourselves out to a fancy dinner and toast your good fortune.