Thursday, September 29, 2011

Desperate Housewives

We are closing week three of forced unemployment and my house and I are becoming more intimate then I would like.  One of the major drawbacks of not working is now I have all this extra time to do fun things but no cool money to implement.  No wine socials, no horseback riding, NO cleaning woman.  So Team Tuna, lets recap how Mrs. Tuna is amusing herself.



I’ve been amazing busy for someone who doesn’t have to visit a veal fattening cubicle every day.  Urban Planning classes have been sucking up a fair amount of time.  I have this one Zoning Law class that the instructor is much more interested in showing you that she’s in charge then in teaching you anything useful. There has been a minimum 5 to 10 page paper due every freaking week, not that she’s grading any of them.  This week’s with the appendix is about 35 pages. Snarky Bitch, focus a little more time on covering your roots.  Wait until I evaluate you on Ratemyprofessors.com.

What I have discovered is that I am now that annoying student who raises their hand and shouts out answers for extra credit points. I’ve become teacher’s pet, mostly this is due to the lack of adult conversation being home alone.  I’m so starved for attention I strike up friendly conversations with 12 year olds at the grocery store about neat study methods.

I’m missing the cleaning woman, Kathy the Wonderful who been vacuuming up dog hair for almost 20 years. I was a little saddened how quickly she found a replacement gig and how I had to figure out how the washing machine works on the delicate cycle. I even braved the inner workings of the carpet shampooer for our bedroom. Gotta pace myself before doing the living room, I don’t want to run out of things to do. The Big Tuna pointed out the house is definitely tidier but he’s still waiting for the French Maid outfit.  This week we’re making faux Chinese from Rachel Ray.

Sweet and Sour Chicken
Salt and pepper
20 ounce can pineapple chunks, drained with 1/2 cup juice reserved
2 tablespoons white vinegar
2 tablespoons soy sauce
4 teaspoons cornstarch
1 tablespoon ketchup
2 teaspoon finely grated fresh ginger
1 ¼ pound skinless chicken breasts cut into 2 inch pieces
1 tablespoon oil
1 red bell pepper cut into 1 inch pieces.

In small bowl combine pineapple juice, vinegar, soy sauce, 2 tablespoons of corn starch, ketchup and ginger.  In separate bowl coat chicken in the remaining cornstarch, salt and pepper.   In skillet, heat oil, add chicken and cook turning occasionally until browned. About 5 minutes and transfer chicken to plate.  Add pepper to skillet and cook about two minutes. Stir in chicken and pineapple chunks.  Add the pineapple juice mixture and heat over medium heat until sauce has thickened, a few minutes. Serve over hot white rice.

One of the perks I had at Giant Engineering Company was free gym membership, not that I was that familiar with the aerobic equipment but still. But since I have no reason to continue wearing control top pantyhose I need to do something to keep that mid roll of fat in check. Flipping through a magazine I came across a home workout, a few jumping jacking, free weights and crunches, I can do this. First day out I followed the pretty colored pictures and thought,  huh I must be in better shape than I thought, I’m barely breathing hard.  I dabbed my brow, had a shower, poured a cup of coffee and examined the text a wee bit more closely.  Apparently I was supposed to do 3 reps, yeah maybe tomorrow. For now, bring on the cupcakes.


37 comments:

Kristina P. said...

I think the idea of unemployment sounds nice. For about 2 weeks. And then, like you, it would get claustrophobic.

Empty Nester said...

Just make sure you stay away from the 8 lb weight ball and you'll be fine. LOL

Kernut the Blond said...

Exercise? What is that? I've heard the word...

I'm busier now than ever, too. Having a great time in UT, heading for Hwy 40/Route 66 on Oct 7th. I know that's a bit far from you, but if you can find the time, I'd love to get together! You're also welcome to tag along as I see the goofy sights along Hwy 40! Going to do the north rim by car either tomorrow or Monday - you are welcome to join me there, too!

stephanie said...

Ha, you're the snarky one today!

Mark said...

Why do you need to exercise? You look good in those heels and your cleaning clothes. wink!
m.

Nicole Leigh Shaw said...

Those carpet shampooers! Beware, it's addicting. I recently bought one and I'm cleaning everything in sight. Soggy socks for weeks because of all the wet carpet.

Nicki said...

Ratemyprofessor.com is a student's saving grace when it comes to Snarky Bitch professors!

The Defiant Marshmallow said...

Save your best writing magic for that Professor Rating and go git 'er!

Oh, and please send that maid over to my house. Thank you.

Janie Junebug said...

Three weeks of unemployment? Other than my brief teaching stint from which I was fired, it's been about 70 weeks for me. It's a way of life now. PULL ME OUT OF THE ABYSS! PLEASE!

Love,
Lola

CanadianMama said...

Wow, you are looking wicked! Seriously, unemployment looks good on you!

Kimberly said...

I've been off o work since February and look where it's got me...dum da dummmmm...what? I kick ass at laundry and can bake a mean facking cake ;)

Shawn said...

I agree with Mark, you look fantastic in your "maids" outfit..is that the way you meet the Big Tuna at the door? You sure do not need to exercise.
I met a woman who had just started an exercise program using a step platform she made out of an old phone book. She does step exercises, while watching TV and drinking a Martini...said she she had already lost 1 1/2 inches from her waist. Sounds like a plan to me!

THE SARCASM GODDESS said...

That sounds yummy! Will you come make it for me?

Red Nomad OZ said...

Here's a little secret ... track down the maid's costume - and voila! A) you won't have time for the housework; B)you'll have all the exercise you can handle; and C) It won't cost a dime ...

mamahasspoken said...

Hubby has been unemployed now for five months.
My house is the cleanest it's been for a long, long time...
Guess I should be thankful for that but do miss the regular pay checks he brought in.....

Crazy Life of a Writing Mom said...

LOL! You are so awesome. And that recipe sounds delicious!

Meg at the Members Lounge said...

Do not succumb to the French Maid uniform. I would succumb to French food and wine, however! Cheers to doing exercise at home. There a whole channel of it on the cable TV, if I only ever accessed it.

Liz Mays said...

Yep, three reps would kinda change things, lol! Glad you're finding some things to occupy your time, but cleaning? At least do something fun too!

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

Cupcakes make everything better. And, hey, every class needs a suck up. Thank goodness they have you!

Mommy Bags said...

You crack me up. Make sure you are having some fun and get out of the house or you will go bat shit crazy.

Mom Fashion World said...

Good recipe! I must try it... sounds yummy!

I'm your newest follower via GFC from the Friday Blog Hop.
Please feel free to visit my blog. Looking forward to seeing you there, and hope you follow me back. Thanks!

http://www.momfashionworld.blogspot.com/

Hilary said...

nothing wrong with starting slow...

Shah Wharton said...

Due to illness I've been unemployed for WAY too long, but I am fortunate to be easily amused with reading and writing and social networking. And of course my poor husband ;D Here to follow from the Blog Entourage linky. Shah .X

Mrs4444 said...

Pace yourself, Woman!
That's one drag of going to school when you're an adult; you could sometimes teach the teacher a few things. (The roots comment was hilarious, btw.)

Julie said...

Oh. Dear. God. You are so funny. I know how you feel. I had to let go of my housekeeper two years ago and I haven't mopped a floor since. I just don't care. Stains from three years ago are still near my kitchen sink and I don't give a **&(. Thank you for stopping by and commenting on my blog. I think we could be great friends! Julie

Jojo said...

My husband lost his job 2 years ago and the cleaning lady was the first to thing to go. I'm feeling that pain with you.

Ashley @ It's Fitting said...

Hysterical! Stopping by from the sunday blog hop!

Phyllin' Phat said...

Love the blog!! I often dream of a day where I can be a stay-at-home pet sitter, but alas...I don't know what the gentle cycle does, where my boyfriend stores the vaccum cleaner, or how to properly fold my toilet paper end into a triangle. It would be the ultimate failure!

Stephanie said...

Oh I gave up my cleaning lady a couple of years ago....I still miss her :(

Vesta Vayne said...

I love that you follow up calling the teacher a snarky bitch by telling her to cover her roots! Hee hee!

twelvedaysold said...

You have to start slow with those workouts. Build it up to 3 reps, you got this! Also I'm validating myself since I had to stop on the first of three circuits on Jillians Michaels' 30 Day Shred this morning.

MommaKiss said...

Cleaning counts as exercise. I've been told.

Joann Mannix said...

Mrs. Tuna,

So very sorry to hear about the crap ass layoff. Ugh.

But you seem to be handling it pretty darn well.

And those extra sets are just annoying. Who does that? Why do I want to torture myself three times over. I hate that and thus it is why I don't do any of the reps. And I think Jillian Michaels is an evil being. Perhaps, even Satan.

My cleaning lady of thirteen years, aka My Maria has developed some health problems and had to quit cleaning. Last week, I had to vacuum. And I cried.

Kara said...

I love Shawn's exercise idea - especially the martini.

Ms. G said...

Vacuuming burns calories! At least that's what I tell myself. Then again my exercise routine is running up and down the stairs because I forgot something : )

Kristy @Loveandblasphemy said...

Maybe the above outfit could serve as your Halloween outfit if you like the slut kind of image. :)

Jean | Delightful Repast said...

You're so funny, Mrs. Tuna! Wish you could come and do some chores at my house!