Monday, April 16, 2012

The Hot Chick


One……..more……..week. One more fricking week Team Tuna before the semester is over with those whiny ass little twerps at ASU. Man up for God’s sake. Write your portion of the mandatory group project and I will not have to pull the pants that hang off your ass over your head in an uncomfortable way.  The anti-joy of an Urban Planning degree is that it’s all about building consensus. My engineering brain can only put up with so much listening to your fancy ass ideas before I just take over and spend the rest of the time convincing you to do it my way. The right way, we all know it, just accept.


 But on the work front, Itty Bitty Consulting has turned me into the Hot Chick. So desirable and enticing with my mad technical skills. All the engineering firms want to date me.  The Endlessly Interviewing client seems to be turning into green-eyed boyfriends. I’ve been captive at their office for the last two months in the perpetual job interview. Where are you going, you’re our little prisoner, keeping me so busy I have no time to follow up on marketing leads or search for new clients.  The added bonus however is they also keep my lover Mr. Refrigerator and I separated and I’ve lost almost ten pounds over the last 8 weeks.

Last week I went to the major transportation conference in Tucson to do meet and greets. The goal was to recruit new members for one of the network organizations, pump up our numbers and take over the world via nerd power. Endlessly Interviewing Company got to see me in full networking action, promising me a full time job if I would just stop passing out my business cards within three hours of my arrival. Especially after I told them I had a phone interview scheduled for later that afternoon with a competitor for which I used my 1-900 voice and scored a face to face interview this week. This of course has not translated into a written offer,  just whispering sweet job promises in my ear as that is their MO.

Free registration, free food and more importantly free booze, which I was drinking on an empty stomach since I was too busy being a little social butterfly to wolf anything down. It was tough to keep my alter ego Mrs. Tuna in check. Best course of action was to go to bed at 8 PM to avoid table dancing and retelling previously posted blog stories including how maxi pads found in the glove box are great for absorbing free coffee.   In keeping with my Hot Chick persona this week’s fare will be nice and spicy.

Deviled Chicken and Peppers
Whole chicken cut up
16 ounce jar hot cherry peppers
4 potatoes chunked, not peeled
1 jar baby corn (because we’re fancy like that)

Brown chicken in olive oil, remove and place in large pot. Add remaining ingredients including juice from hot peppers. Add 2 cups of water and cook over medium heat for approximately 1 ½ hours or until chicken is completely cooked. WARNING-WARNING-WARNING.  This is very spicy, be prepared, it only gets hotter the next day.


So things they are a changing in the hood, thinking I’m going to score a real grown up job in the near future or even continue working from home in my pajamas. And……I am going to be turning 50. Look, I hardly flinched when I typed that.  I am no longer the trophy wife.

But even bigger, Sheldon got engaged 2 weeks ago to a British guy whose accent makes me feel like I’ve dropped 15 IQ points overnight. Nice chap, see, I’ve got the Queen’s English down already, bring on the crumpets. I’m sure wedding preparations will bring lots of blog fodder, hopefully he won’t actually read about it here. So now that we are getting a bit of a breather, I’ll be back at the weekly post grind. Been missing you Team Tuna!!! XOXOXOXO


26 comments:

MikeG said...

English words that may need translating:

Lorry = Truck
Cheers = Thank you
Tea = Dinner
Loo = Restroom
Sponge = Cake
Crisp = Chip
Chip = French Fry
Motorway = Highway/Interstate
Pavement = Sidewalk
Copper = Policeman

And I may have sneaked a look at your blog

The Brit Guy :)

Red Nomad OZ said...

Oh, so NOW you're being unfaithful to my downunder buddy Curtis Stone. I guess that's what being a hot chick can do to a girl ...

And what is wrong with Brit guy, anyway - most of those words he's translated above are Australian!!!

Ami said...

Um... I thought Sheldon was going to marry my Matt?

Although he has Wendy to fall back on, both figuratively and literally. So whatever. ::shrug::

See ya later, hot chick.

Laurel's Quill said...

50 is the new 30, didn't you know that...I cling to that as I am turning 65 this summer...yikes, medicare. Do you know that I have already received two dozen brochures int eh mail from every supplement carrier in the free world. Hope you get a job soon:)Laurel

Sandra said...

Oh how I've missed you my sexy Tuna lady! You are as funny, witty, and clever as I remembered you to be, and now you getting to be a hot, busy thing with your fancy job offers and your staying home in your pjs to run your soon to be multimillion dollar empire.
Have to say though, was sooooo relating to the university group projects...sigh...and back to reality I go. I'm "supposed" to be studying for a final. Oh, and my summer session begins next week. Yeehaw. I'd rather be held captive at a job interview, you sexy thang! Fifty schmifty!

Le'Ann Ruggles said...

Biscuit = Cookie, so I'm not sure what they serve with gravy. Good luck with your project... and the never-ending interview.

Mamma has spoken said...

I won't give you translations from American English to British English just because I think it would be fun to say and/or think using the wrong context definition ;o)
Problem with the younger kids these days (yes I sound like an old person here) is that they think they know it all. But that's ok, I reflect back to the beginnings of my career and did the same thing. Guess it's true, karma is a true bitch.

Val said...

Wait! Your grade depends on what those young 'uns contribute to your project? I shudder at the thought.

Janie Junebug said...

Best wishes to Sheldon. The Hurricane was going to marry a Brit but changed her mind. My favorite Brit speak: "fanny." It's not your rear end. It's your lady bits.

Love,
Janie

Andrea said...

Yay! You're coming back! Yummy chicken salad too.

Lisa said...

Congratulations to Sheldon. And congrats to you for losing the 10 lbs. and having so many possibilities for a new job! I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Meg at the Members Lounge said...

I think it's very important you nail down all the British lingo on how to order drinks! Congrats on ending the torture at ASU!

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...

So glad the semester is about to cut you a break, and wow you've been busy!

The chicken and pepper recipe sounds fabulous!!!!!!!!!!

WhisperingWriter said...

Mmmm...that recipe sounds really good!

ADoC said...

A real grown-up job? That's bloody fantastic! (see, getting you ready for the ((2nd)) Brit invasion!)

Caffeinated OC Mommy said...

Note to my Darling Self...
Must... put... Mrs. Tuna's blog button on my blog!!! xoxo

EmptyNester said...

Congrats to Sheldon! And to your potential new job! And to putting those underling students in their places! LOL

Hilary said...

Congrats to Sheldon! How exciting... his accent sounds amazing... there is just something about a british accent...

The Defiant Marshmallow said...

First, congrats to Sheldon! Or is it supposed to be "Best Wishes"? My mother told me once, but now I forget. And she's dead, so I can't ask her. Or maybe I can, but I hope I don't hear an answer, cause that'll scare me.

Anyway, great news on Sheldon.

Also, don't fear 50. I hit it last year and I'm doing great. No problems with memory, fitness, flexibility, something, something, something else, and something else. What was I talking about?

Oh yeah, your blog. Right.

You're the best, Mrs. Tuna! Don't let them see you sweat. Or something like that.

Doreen McGettigan said...

Oh I've missed you! So much has happened for both of us...
I read that women are the smartest at age 54..you have something to look forward to..me I'm 54 now..am I going to start losing my smarts next year??
Welcome back and good luck with everything and congratulations..

MOV said...

Tuna,

First, congrats to Sheldon! who cares if the guy is great or not, he talks British! that would, like, totally be enough for me.

Second, Mr. Refrigerator is MY lover, not yours, so keep your little hot chick hands off of him!!!

Third, congrats on being so spectacular that beaucoup companies want you.

You know what I want? more of your writing. You have been missed!!!!!!!

xxo
MOV

Laoch of Chicago said...

Such good news means you are entitled to a nap!

Mom of the Perpetually Grounded said...

You keep sizzling Mrs. Tuna! The world is your frying pan : )

Congratulations to Sheldon too!!!! I'm looking forward to those wedding plan posts.

The Empress said...

WHAT IN THE WORLD??

I never even saw this coming.

Anytime a dapper English fellow is involved, details are needed.

I've got nothing but time...

xo

CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!

Stephanie said...

I always knew you were the Hot Chick at school. Just saying:)

I Wonder Wye said...

And re the English words from your first fan above? Don't forget the 'boot' = car trunk. THAT's where you hide the body of the saggy-ass twerps that insist in getting in your way at school...