A few months ago I documented my to Kool 4 Skool challenges on getting my ass in gear to get a degree in Urban Planning. The current economic climate made me realize I needed to put myself on my own pedestal. Since I have the social skills of a feral cat I know I need the technical edge to keep me from being eaten like a limping zebra. I was faced with the trials and tribulations of obtaining mimeographed transcripts from 1040 BC, getting my rabies shots and wading through used condom wrappers to get accepted at ASU.
But my personal life’s plate already shows signs of too many trips to the all you can eat buffet. What was I thinking? How can I crowbar in one more stinking thing? A typical week for Mrs. Tuna involves the following random acts.
I try and torture myself at 5 AM two or three mornings a week with Eva’s Braun’s best friend Helga the yoga instructor. You there, flamingo, spread your legs wider and get closer to the floor. This may be something I can let go, actually, I’m sure I can let go. I visit the invalid horse Lad an hour away once a week and ride the loaner horse 3 or 4 days a week. I sit on a variety of professional boards and lecture sweet young girls on the fabulousness of working in a man’s world. And oh yeah, a minimum 40 hour work week at Giant Engineering Company.
I also need to make time to wear my naughty girl school outfits, I mean make dinner for the Big Tuna. At this point in the blog Sheldon is poking her eyes with a sharp object to burn that image out of her head. Mommy and Daddy never did the nasty sweetie, we found you under a rose bush in the garden. Maybe honey child you should skip to the end of this post. Here is a fast during the week recipe so we’re eating more than drive thru next week.
Applesauce Pork Chops
1 jar of applesauce
4 medium thick pork chops
Pour half the jar of applesauce in the bottom of a shallow square baking pan. Place pork chops on top and cover with remaining applesauce and sprinkle with cinnamon. Cover with foil and cook at 350 degrees for an hour. Serve with mashed or bake potatoes.
During the winter school break I sent an email, even using my real name to fellow blogger Mrs. 4444s about how to get more followers and comments. Her amazing counsel helped me grow from 25 to over 100 followers, over 50 comments and a tweet on my last post and meet up with a ton of amazing and way funnier peeps than me. It’s been wonderful to have other people besides my drunken friends tell me I have mad skills. But I’ve been devoting a lot of time to my blog this break and know I have to make a few adjustments with carrying a full time class schedule on top of everything else.
So here is my commitment to you my fellow readers, I will continue to post every single week, but I may cheat and repost some of my earlier silliness. I assure you, I was just as freaking funny six months ago when none of you knew I existed. Bear with me Team Tuna, don’t Unfollow me. (This is the Facebook equivalent of being Defriended) Same time, same place next week. Peace out. See I’m hipper and more of a sorority sister already.